The Self-righteous Hypocrisy of Christians.
Doesn't this religion claim to "love"?
“What if I could prophesy and understand all mysteries and all knowledge?
And what if I had faith that moved mountains?
I would be nothing, unless I loved others.”
- 1 Corinthians 13:2 (CEV).
Christians are sometimes the most tone-deaf and insensitive people in our society today, and whilst this could be a result of the expression of the natural human tendency to be selfish, I believe it boils down more to a mixture of vain hypocrisy and an exaggerated sense of self-righteousness.
We can be so critical and unsympathetic when we deal with people around us, especially when they are unbelievers, and even to fellow believers.
I understand the importance of standing on values and being vocal about the things that you agree and don’t agree with, and I also understand the place of speaking against acts and habits that go against God’s instructions.
That’s not the crux of the matter.
What I have a problem with is how willing, and almost eager, many so-called believers are to criticise, condemn, and harshly rebuke people, all in the name of correction and standing for righteousness.
I hate to break it to you, but even if you pull down, humiliate, or degrade someone in the name of God, it doesn’t mean that God is on your side.
The defining nature of our God is LOVE.
Everything about Him – his mercy, his goodness, his faithfulness, his wisdom, his justice, and all the rest – are all predicated under the love that he has for mankind.
This love is seen clearly in his dealings with us on a day-to-day basis.
Also, God has an equal amount of love for EVERYBODY on this planet, no matter who they are, where they are from, what they’ve done, what they are doing, or what they will do.
This means that the same love God has for that person who you think is the worst sinner on earth is the same love he has for YOU, and the same love that he has for his son, Jesus.
I know it feels good to people when they call themselves things like “God’s favourite” and “Abba’s beloved” and those other things- and I’m not saying they are wrong, I’m just saying it’s not exclusive (Acts 10:34).
The love of God is free-for-all and it’s available on the table for anybody who is interested in partaking in it.
The only thing that differs in how God relates with us is the level of relationship and understanding that we have of him, and even then, we can all still access the same depths of fellowship, if we desire it.
My point is very simple: Sinner or not, Born-again or not, Christian or not – God loves everyone all the same.
He might not agree with the actions and lifestyles of everybody whom he loves, but his love is unconditional, so it was never determined by your actions or by your lifestyle in the first place.
We live right because it’s the only way we can show God that we love him, and not because we want to make him love us or answer our prayers.
In fact, there’s more rejoicing in heaven when a sinner repents than when a believer prays for hours upon hours (Luke 15:7).
So, Mr or Mrs Christian, there’s really nothing “special” about you that should make you believe that you’re allowed to treat other people in any manner you please.
Pay close attention because I’m going somewhere that’s very crucial.
Now, with this foundation in mind, we can clearly see that God holds no biases in his love toward people, and with that established, you will then agree with me that it makes absolutely NO SENSE for a person who claims to love God to treat people that God also loves in a less-than-ideal manner.
It’s very conflicting in itself as an action.
I’ll get into the hypocritical aspect of this in a bit, but I want to dwell on the other reason for his very prevalent problem: SELF-RIGHTEOUSNESS.
Which is simply the state of being “convinced of one’s own righteousness, especially in contrast with the actions and beliefs of others: narrow-mindedly moralistic.”
For this context, self-righteousness is when a Christian is convinced that they have the ability to judge and condemn the actions of others because of the pedestalised perception they have of their relationship with God and also because of the righteous life that they might be living.
The perfect example of this is the story of the Pharisee who went to pray.
This was his prayer: “God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.” (Luke 18:11-12)
Jesus described him as “proud” and basically said that there was no way God was going to answer such a prayer because it was coming from a place of arrogance.
He didn’t say that the Pharisee was wrong, meaning that he was not lying about doing all those things, but his heart posture for doing them (which inherently matters to God more) was not right, and so his prayers did not even leave the roof of the temple.
Meanwhile, this was the answered prayer of the tax collector that was branded as “sinful”: “God, have mercy on me, a sinner.” (Luke 18:13)
Can you see the difference?
I’m sure you can.
Which means you can also see that there’s a tendency for a man to become proud because he’s living according to the commands of God.
And this pride will, in turn, make him despise the people around him who do not live the same.
What’s much worse than this is when this self-righteousness is backed by cultural and traditional sentiments.
It becomes a recipe for disaster because all forms and traces of human empathy just fly out the window.
You can find situations where this exaggerated sense of self-righteousness is being expressed through traditional biases particularly among the older generation of African/Nigerian Christians.
And, in case you don’t know, I’ll tell you that it’s never pleasant to experience or witness it in action.
Honestly, religion can be a monster in the wrong hands, and even Christianity is no exception.
It’s the perfect tool to enslave, condemn, and trap people, especially when it’s taken out of its original foundation: The love of God.
Tradition is why you’ll see believers being nasty to other believers who do not conform to certain habits and lifestyles that they uphold, not because they are “ungodly”, but because they do not fit in with their cultural biases.
A good example of this is thigs like dyeing of hair, women wearing trousers, men wearing earrings, and many others.
These things often get major resistance, not because they are exactly “sin”, but because they do not agree with the long held traditions of a particular group of people.
Yes, I understand the desire to ensure that Christians look different from the rest of the world, but what I don’t agree with is the method of execution to achieve this goal.
Embarrassing people in public because of what they are wearing, publicly calling out and shaming people for their offenses, offering derogatory remarks to a person based on the mistakes of their past- all these things are not the way to go.
You’ll see Christians tearing down other Christians for doing certain things they do not understand, and they will do it all in the name of God, feeling wholly justified while they are at it.
It’s quite appalling.
Unhealthy Religiosity + Rigid Traditionalism is a terrible combination.
When I say “Tradition”, I don’t mean practical actions or ways of life that have helped Christians to live properly in the faith for centuries.
What I mean by tradition is relative, PERSONAL, and cultural beliefs that a group of Christians have adopted for a long time and have now, consciously or unconsciously, made the standard for every Christian that they come across.
Self-righteousness and a lack of basic empathy are what make us see people struggling with the faith, confused with understanding certain things, or asking uncomfortable questions and just dismiss them abruptly.
We tell them to pray more or to read their Bible more, and we imply that they are only struggling because they are not trying enough, like it was ever about their personal effort in the first place.
When did salvation ever become about “trying”?
This self-aggrandising nature also trickles down to the way we act when we go out on evangelism to reach out to the unsaved.
Many Christians don’t do it out of compassion or care.
Some people do it just to add names to their list, others do it to make themselves feel good, while some might do it just out of religious obligation.
There’s no compassion in you to actually see the person you’re reaching out to turn to the better way of living; you’re just doing it out of pride.
There’s no mention of God’s love or the sacrifice of Jesus, just arrogance mixed with damning condemnation.
“You’re a sinner, and you’ll burn in hell. Repent of your sinful ways or die!”
And we behave like this to “outsiders” as much as we do it to ourselves.
If you were to open up to some “Christians”, there’s a very good chance you would regret doing so.
Many of us are the chiefs of gossip and of divulging information that was given to us in trust and confidentiality.
When some Christians hear stories of people experiencing bad situations, they are always ready to make them feel like it’s as a result of their actions: “It’s because you didn’t pray against it.”
Or they quickly make it all about them: “I reject it; may that never be me!”
Whilst it’s okay to pray for better for yourself, do you really have to do it in their presence immediately?
Or better still, must it be done in such a condescending manner?
It’s terrible thinking to believe that things are going well for you in your life only because you pray regularly or because you “rejected” bad situations.
Very terrible thinking.
Personally, it bothers me to see just how many people have been hurt, broken, and beaten by churches, religious leaders, and certain Christian sects.
People have been left in terrible conditions by people that they would have never imagined would do what they did because, whilst they were all religious, loving, and respectable on the outside, their hearts and actions were just as vile and corrupt as that of the basest, natural man.
By the design and desire of God, Christian homes and churches are meant to be the primary places of community and vulnerability, a safe space where people can connect with one another, share their feelings, and be built up together in love and faith.
But what do we have today?
We have places where shame and hypocrisy are the order of the day.
People in many churches and homes can’t or won’t ever voice out whenever they are faced with anything, due to fear of being rebuked, judged, or condemned.
This is why many Christians that are struggling with lust, depression, homosexual desires, religious apathy, and many other justifiable feelings have nowhere to turn to because there’s nowhere around them that seems safe.
Nowhere in the faith seems safe, at least, so they find solace outside God and outside his boundaries.
Countless churches have the numbers and are packed to the brim with crowds, but in reality, there’s no actual congregation.
It’s all quite sad.
Way too many young believers do not have an older Christian person that they can trust for advice or teaching because, well, let’s be frank, most of them just don’t get it.
They might be strong in their knowledge of God, but they do not have the wisdom and emotional nuance that’s required to understand and navigate the contexts and struggles that younger believers face in today’s age and time.
Many of them claim that they do, but the truth is that most of them just DO NOT.
The frustrating hypocrisy of this entire thing is that Christianity, both as a way of life and as a religion, is built on Love and Grace.
And yet, we seem to place all emphasis on our human actions.
Our actions are important because they are proof of our faith, agreed, but they are not the basis or the foundation of the faith that we have in God.
The Bible encourages us to be “perfect like the Father” (Matt 5:48), but it also tells us that we are undergoing a daily and moment-after-moment transformation (II Corinthians 2:18).
Being human and being a Christian means there is going to be a fight and struggle for as long as you are on Earth; that’s why God is there to help.
If you’ve received this help, it’s only the bare minimum that you extend the same grace to everyone else that’s around you.
Even though God’s way is THE way, we can’t trample on people in our bid to show them this way; it doesn’t make sense.
When has something ever been built up by being dragged down? Never.
Your holier-than-thou attitude will never convert someone because it has already made them defensive before they even heard you speak.
Your condemnation message, as true as it might be, does not represent the fullness of God, which is mercy and forgiveness.
We have freely received love and grace from God, and we bask in it, but when it’s now time for us to extend this grace to others, it becomes a problem.
Why?
I really want to understand it.
The biggest reflection of our hypocrisy as Christians is how we pick and choose the actions to condemn and the ones to condone.
And we do this based on what our hearts and minds can “stomach”, things that don’t make us too uncomfortable.
So, it’s okay for a woman that beats her househelp to preach on the altar, but the woman that was formerly a prostitute cannot climb the same altar to sing.
Hypocrisy.
A woman that leaves her abusive husband has “broken the sanctity of marriage”, but nobody pays attention to the man that’s been beating her every night.
Hypocrisy.
Let’s “welcome” the politician who has pending corruption cases in court with open arms, but the teenage boys struggling with drug addiction must not be allowed to enter into the house of God.
HYPOCRISY.
It’s so funny when churches keep certain people locked out and segregated from the rest of the congregation because they are or were involved in certain things.
I understand not wanting to condone and encourage unrighteousness, but if not the church, then where should the lost and unsaved go?
Jesus himself said he came to save the sinners, not the saved. The 99, and not the 1.
So what is our own issue?
How exactly do we hope to bring these “sinners” into the fold if they can’t even come into the house of God to worship or hear the Word?
The only danger I see here is the people coming into the church and not conforming to change whilst they influence those who were already there, but I also believe that in a church where the presence of the Holy Spirit resides and the true Word of God is being taught, it’s almost impossible for this to happen.
As Christians, we should be accepting of people, not encouraging their vices and ills, but being conscious of the human that they are inside and the eternal soul they possess.
That’s how we obey the commandment to love.
It’s very important to God, and to our own utmost benefit, that we treat each other with patience and empathy, even when we relate with people who are outside of our faith and with people living lifestyles we don’t agree with.
You have no right to condemn anybody. Absolutely no right at all.
“God doesn’t like what you’re doing” is very different from “God is angry with you, and He will punish you for doing this.”
Correct, don’t rebuke.
And even if/when you do, it has to come from a place of love and desire to see a change.
We have been loved so that we can love, in the same way we’ve been given Grace so we can be gracious.
Resist the urge to judge.
Resist the urge to make someone’s spiritual struggles feel like the right time for you to “prove” your own righteousness.
In fact, sometimes just shut up and keep your advice to yourself.
Not every moment requires you to have the best Bible verse or the best prayer points to share.
Sometimes, you have to weep with people like Jesus did with Mary and Martha.
Sometimes, you have to eat a nice meal with them like Jesus did with Zacchaeus.
Sometimes, you have to accept people the way they are and then show them a better way, like Jesus did with Mary Magdalene.
God has met you where you are, so extend that to everyone around you.
This is not an encouragement of compromise or to ignore wrongs; I’m just saying you should treat people how you want to be treated.
Or even better, treat people the way you’d like God to treat you.
The biggest problem we have is that we lack LOVE amongst us.
So when somebody falls or stumbles, it’s either we shame or condemn them, or we ignore their wrongs completely.
Meanwhile, we’re meant to find that balance between correction and forgiveness, between acceptance and rebuke.
That’s how we do better.
We must never forget:
“The second most important commandment says:
‘Love others as much as you love yourself.’
No other commandment is more important… “
- Mark 12:31 (CEV).
This is Issue #1 of Counter Cultural, make sure not to miss any of the subsequent editions that will be coming your way very soon.
“Personally, it bothers me to see just how many people have been hurt, broken, and beaten by churches, religious leaders, and certain Christian sects.
People have been left in terrible conditions by people that they would have never imagined would do what they did because, whilst they were all religious, loving, and respectable on the outside, their hearts and actions were just as vile and corrupt as that of the basest, natural man.”
I carry this burden too bro! Breaks my heart. What breaks mine too is teachings used to control, manipulate and oppress and flipped in ways that is not intended by a God of love. Thanks for sharing this article and so freely your heart in it.
this was an amazinggg read!
every sentence hit home.